Change

Change is difficult to say the least. I love to rock along surrounded by the comfort of everyday routines, content in the knowledge that I can handle whatever the day may decide to toss my way. But life is crazy like that. When we are most comfortable, we sometimes are forced to make changes that shove us out of our comfort zones and into the arms of new adventures.

These past few years I have abandoned this blog and many other things that created the pattern of my world. A pandemic has certainly contributed to this alteration in my lifestyle. But now, with two vaccinations and three boosters on board, I am trying to return to some sort of normalcy as is each and every one of us. But…my new norm includes still wearing a mask indoors and out if there are large groups of people. My new norm still leaves me uncomfortable removing my mask to eat in a restaurant, to visit with new people and certainly intense discomfort if I must fly on an airplane. I know I am not the only person experiencing these emotions, struggling with the adjustment to new norms and wondering when, if ever, life will resume as we once took it for granted.

Since my last posting here, I have abandoned the high rise lifestyle of downtown urban Austin and moved North to a retirement community in nearby Georgetown Texas. Unsure at first about whether this was “my cup of tea”, I have come to embrace a new wonder about living in my own home with a lovely garden for a backyard on the ground level of terra firma. Do I miss the spectacular panoramic views overlooking Lady Bird Lake? Absolutely, but this move has brought me closer to Mother Nature and returned me to my roots of digging in the soil and nurturing seeds to fruition and just enjoying the wonders of bees, birds and butterflies and all the other creatures that visit my little piece of earth each day. Perhaps it is the result of age that I find just contemplating what is around me to be an exciting adventure. Whatever it is, I am thoroughly enjoying this “change” in my life.

Carolina Wren

There is high drama in the wild green space behind my back garden. A local Road Runner skirts quickly through my back garden and up into the green belt in pursuit of breakfast. Road Runners can fly but definitely prefer to “run”. He darted and dashed making remarkably quick 90 degree turns and captured a rodent in astoundingly quick time, hurrying back through my garden to enjoy his meal. And this morning a gray fox trotted through with his latest catch and in the process startled a buck who immediately chased the fox away. I will never know the end of this story because they disappeared into the surrounding trees and bushes beyond my view. As I complete this piece a resident squirrel races along the top of my back fence and a juvenile doe saunters by as butterflies, dragonflies, moths, bees, wasps, lizards and birds flit about exploring my new garden oasis and hopefully make a decision to share our common space.

Resident Squirrel

Blue Jay
Monarch Butterfly
Bath time for a Tufted Titmouse
Apache Aloe Bloom

Happy Gardening!

Jumpstarting My Life

I am half way there…maybe. I received my first dose of the Covid 19 vaccine almost a month ago and am scheduled to receive my second dose this coming Saturday. But will I?

Health Care Professionals – Our Fierce Warriors

My initial encounter in this process was wonderful, very efficient and from arrival time to the shot entering my arm perhaps 10 minutes elapsed. I was impressed. I was given a card with the date of my first shot and the potential due date for my second shot. I was told I would be emailed the date and time of my appointment. And therein lies the rub. To date I have received no email and an email I sent requesting instructions generated a robotic response with a phone number to call if I needed further assistance. So I called the number only to hear the dreaded terminal busy signal and the web site very politely states there are no more vaccination time slots at this time. Refresh, refresh, refresh!

On the plus side…I retired on January 31, 2020 so my timing was perfect. I have used my lockdown time to hone my artistic abilities. I have tried countless new recipes, keeping the best, trashing the rest and eaten my way through a year in solitary confinement. I transformed the balcony of my condo into a 75 square foot garden and somehow managed to grow an astounding amount of food. I’ve watched countless U-Tube videos on gardening learning about new plants in exotic places and developed a list of favorites…the Mumbai Gardener in India, Bob Blast for art, and Crazy Lamp Lady who manages to do a fabulous job of taking me along with her as she scours thrift shops seeking a buried treasure to flip for profit. I discovered that anything I might want to learn is available there. I’ve read a long list of books and watched multiple television programs. In short, I’ve tried to maintain my sanity as best I could. I am in good company for every other person in my world has done their best as well. So I wait…

Swiss Chard, Lettuce, Tomatoes, Basil, Mother Thyme, Lemon Grass, Peppers
Small scale Balcony Composting
Cruicial survival tools
“Alone” – A Mixed Media Project
Acrylic 2020

Update: Success! I received my second shot and unlike the first one it did manage to take me down a notch. I had fever, general malaise, body aches, headache and the annoying symptom of not being able to keep my eyes open for want of sleep! A very small price to pay for my freedom after a year of isolation. I’ll still wear a double mask, still social distance, wash hands and continue to try to be a thoughtful and caring human because I DO CARE about my fellow humans.

Be a Care Giver!

DO YOU CARE? If so, please wear a mask.The life you save is loved and treasured my many other people.

An Old Friend Returns

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Old Friend

So I am still trying to expand my interests and fill my “corona” time as I remain isolated and in safe harbor in my living space. Before the hard lockdown occurred, one of my oldest friends came to visit for a couple of weeks. We knew we would be isolated and spending much time at home, but this didn’t bother us, simply because we have always enjoyed each others company and have many of the same interests. Our time was spent planning meals, cooking, playing cards, reliving old memories, and working on art projects.

In the course of her visit during one of our reminiscing moments, I lamented that I no longer had my guitar. I had loaned it to a granddaughter and it had migrated to its last known residence in the halls of the music department at La Jolla High School where I am hopeful some young budding virtuoso was strumming those strings and creating great music. In retirement I thought I might return to picking out a few tunes and was saddened when I realized my Aria was gone. When my friend heard this she reminded me that I had given her my first guitar many years ago, an act that had been totally wiped from my memory. She told me she knew where my old guitar was and that she believed she could get it returned to me. This became her mission and nothing can stop her from completing a mission.

Within a few weeks, a huge box arrived at my home and when I opened the box and removed the plastic wrap, my eyes fell upon an old friend, my learner guitar, a 52 year old companion that helped a young woman of 22 cope with life and find happiness for many years with girls scouts and friends singing around a campfire. I wept with joy at the sight.

So I began spending some time each day trying to pull the chords from the retired files in my brain and toughening my fingertips. At one point a long time ago, my fingers could fly from one chord to another and my right hand could strum and pic automatically to the beat of the song. Now I am like a toddler learning to walk…I move slowly, lose my balance frequently, then pick myself up and try again. Just in a short two week period, I have gotten better so muscle memory is beginning to kick in and hopefully in the not too distant future, I will be able to play some of my old favorites.

Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold! An old friend is home!

Happy strumming!

The Enemy Without

Frontline Warrior

“I don’t have it”. “I’m clean”. “I know I’m OK because I don’t have any symptoms”. I have heard these statements and many others when people are justifying not wearing a mask or not maintaining social distancing or just participating in an activity that they can’t seem to live without. Studies are showing that a large percentage of people infected with Covid-19 are asymptomatic. This means they are carriers of the virus and as such, close contact with loved ones or people in general may mean you are a 21st century Typhoid Mary, a real and present danger to elderly, immuno-compromised or other members of our population that may be susceptible to attack from Covid-19. This virus is extremely virulent, easily communicable and as family members of over 50,000 fellow Americans can attest, it is deadly. The enemy is without. It floats, jumps, hitches a ride steathily seeking a host where it can grow, multiply and morph as it spreads its wickedness. Its goal is survival. Small in size but a giant with real clout, Covid-19 has turned our world upside down and our “norm” will most probably be changing, just as it changed after 9/11.

Today is my birthday and I am by myself celebrating 74 trips around the sun. I am immuno-compromised and at age 74, I certainly fall in the elderly category. This morning was a beautiful sun-shiny day, blue skies, soft breeze and a perfect temperature of 66 degrees. I decided to don my mask, camera and binoculars and go for a walk on Lady Bird Lake. People are out and about and I was astounded by how many people are NOT wearing a mask on the trail. They are biking, running and walking, huffing and puffing as they speed past me on the trail apparently with no fear of the silently lurking virus that has the potential to snuff out their lives. Are they stupid? Or do they just not care that they may be spreading death to others? I’ve worked as a nurse for 40+ years, caring for many patients in isolation and never have I been afraid of going into the hospital and doing my job. But this is different. This virus is a killer in ways that scientists and physicians are still trying to map. If healthcare workers are fearful, then everyone should be very afraid.

So I enjoyed my short escape from my condo walls and captured some photos of a few feathered friends along the way. I sat on a secluded bench and just soaked in the dappled sunshine under a canopy of new green leaves on towering bald cypress and oak trees. Alone but not really alone sharing nature with strangers during this most strange time in the history of our planet. Be safe, wash your hands, wear a mask if not for you then for your grandmother or other loved ones. This too shall pass but unfortunately I believe we will be dealing with this monster for quite a while yet.

Blue Jay (Internet image)

Green Heron

Male Cardinal

Red-bellied Woodpecker nest site last year. Will they return this year or have I already missed their visit?

Green Heron

Happy Social Distancing!

Anatomy of a Bird – Life In Corona Time

Retirement was scary for me and as I tried to analyze the “why” of this, I came to realize that much of this fear was directly related to my perceived loss of identity. Who was I? Who am I now? For 40+ years I have been a nurse working in a hospital environment for most of that time span. It has been a long and rewarding career throughout and a roller coaster of  happy and sad memorable events. How many different lives did I touch? Did I grow in experience, common sense and knowledge during that time? Will my absence be noted in the grand scheme of things? No matter what the career field, I think the prospect of retirement can give birth to many different emotions about our relevance to our world. Fresh on the heels of my retirement, our world dropped into the Covid-19 pandemic, another change in my already changing world as social distancing and fear began to invade my world. Lots of mixed emotions here. My instinct and my driving desire is to rush forth, return to the hospital work because I know the desperate need of healthcare workers, the overwhelming fatigue of 12 or 16 hour shifts and the heartbreaking tasks ahead for all of these wonderful people. Those are my emotions driving me. The reality is that I am old and immunocompromised and as such very high risk and my brain knows that my time has passed. I’ve passed the torch to a new generation of tech smart, dedicated men and women who will rock this challenge. Besides, my daughters have me on house arrest!

In the grand scheme of retirement things, I believe myself to be fortunate because of my varied interests, one of which is a wannabee artist. I have discovered that retirement freed me to spend more time exploring many different art projects. My latest interest is in mixed media. Truth be told, I have tinkered in art in many different forms throughout my life and some of my earliest memories include art work from kindergarten using crayons to oil paint, watercolors, tempera paint, oil sticks, oil pastels, soft pastels and yes, even house paint when constructing scenery for a girl scout camp site at Cadette Event. Art has always been a part of my life and happily it is now filling my retirement hours and now “corona” time as well. The pandemic has isolated many of us, particularly if one happens to be older and in possession of some other co-morbidities. So during the first two months of my retirement, I have tried to find my “new” way, my new routine. There are no alarm clocks in my life now, only two cats that yell me awake each morning when their hunger bellies ring. After feeding the beasts, coffee is the first order of my day. Enjoyed with a dive into my newspaper, it propels me to decisions about what I might accomplish today.

I am always amazed that my brain will seize upon an idea and as time passes, that idea may spring to life upon a canvas or board. I take photos along this journey because I have learned that cameras never lie. My eye and my brain may rationalize something I have put upon a canvas, but the camera screams any inconsistencies or mistakes I have made along my creative journey. Below is a montage of snapshots of my journey through the recreation of a James Audubon print a la Ginny.

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A quick pencil sketch followed by selection of my color palette from various paper stash

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Extinct Carolina Parakeet-My version of a James Audubon print from 1811

So my “corona” time in my new “retirement” mode is guiding me to create a whole “corona bird” portfolio. Using slips of paper (cut from the huge volumes I have collected over the past 15 years), paste, pen and pencil I have returned to my kindergarten skills using scissors, paper and glue to build my artistic version of some of my favorite birds. Perhaps this alone time has allowed reflection on the possibility of creating my new identity as an artist. After all, Grandma Moses didn’t begin her career as an artist until she had reached the tender young age of 78! Maybe there is hope for me!

Happy  Retirement!!

 

Treasure Hunt

One wall of books in Booked Up

Adventure and things of interest can be just a short stretch down the road as my sister and I experienced a few weekends ago. We set out for Archer City, Texas with our final goal of visiting Larry McMurtry’s sprawling bookshop named “Booked Up’ to peruse our way through the more than 200,000 tomes he has ensconced there.

Quincey, a Columbian Mammoth

Along the way we made a stop at America’s newest designated park, the Mammoth National Monument. At this location near Waco, two young boys exploring a creek bed saw an interesting outcropping and the discovery was made of a huge femur bone which was identified as belonging to a Columbian Mammoth that lived approximately 55,000 years ago during the Pleistocene Epoch which spanned 2.5 million years to 10,000 years ago.  Upon further investigation, excavation determined that their find was indeed a momentous one…a nursery herd of these Mammoths had apparently been caught in a flash flood thousands of years ago.  Our young tour guide who expertly educated us on our tour, poured a wealth of knowledge into us about these huge creatures that roamed this part of Texas. Fourteen feet high at the shoulder and approximately the size of a regular sized yellow school bus, they wandered through a grassland of six-foot high grasses accompanied by camels who it is theorized shared a symbiotic relationship with the mammoths. As she explained, the Mammoths had extremely poor vision and possibly couldn’t identify real predators from grass blowing in the wind while the camels had excellent vision and became the alarm system for these huge mammals. Absolutely worth the visit if your path brings one near.

Quincey

We pushed forward to check in at our home away from home for the next two nights, the Spur Hotel in Archer City. Built in 1928, it has been totally renovated and offers eleven rooms that are reminiscent of how hotel rooms must have been in the olden days…small, cozy with homemade quilts adorning the beds but thankfully, a completely modern bathroom. We ate at Murn’s directly across from our hotel, obviously a beloved local watering hole and eatery for all Archer City residents. A long but enjoyable day and we collapsed into our beds to rest up for the piece de resistance of our day trip…Booked Up!

Being a true bibliophile, a visit to this bookstore, is the equivalent of stepping into book heaven. The main room is climate controlled and this is where the rare and expensive books are housed. Connected to this main room is a warehouse and an annex, not climate controlled, so very cold. It was a treasure hunt because the thousands of books were loosely categorized into sections (birds, poetry, civil war, history, mysteries, etc.) labeled by scraps of paper. Within those categories it was every man for himself because they were NOT alphabetized by author which made it virtually impossible to find any one certain book. To make matters even more challenging, there are at least three other buildings filled with books. It is a work in progress and that progress is apparently an extremely slow one. All that being said, I still managed to find some book treasures that I couldn’t live without after four hours of searching up and down, floor-to-ceiling aisles of books.

Literally we were on a quest for buried book treasures and along the way enjoyed the camaraderie of a shared sister experience.  Adventure can be discovered close to home so make the time, book the reservation and make it happen. So worth it!!

Happy booking!